So I was taking my daily peruse (is that even a noun?) of Jezebel.com when I stumbled upon this gem: one of the writers at Glamour magazine has come up with 8 new terms for “sexy stuff you do between the sheets”. He starts off the article by discussing some of the imagery that common sex terms conjure. I mean, I know we don’t all want to refer to sex acts by seemingly scientific names (intercourse, cunnilingus, and the works), but some of the terms we use commonly aren’t exactly, well, glamorous. For example, “eating out”. According to the writer, “this made my friend think of “a pig at a trough,” which is not the image I want girls to think of as my head dips below her belly-button”, and I couldn’t agree with him more. Here are the new terms he plans to coin:
1. “Eating out”= Treasure Hunting (or a scavenger hunt if it’s less than optimal)
2. “Come”= Finish, alternatively go/went/gone
3. “Boner”= It
4. “Queef”= Hippo Giggles (my fave)
5. “Doggy Style”= Power Meeting
6. “Anal Sex”= Lady MacBeth, and I quote, “because she’s so pushy and potentially awful, but she’s a scene stealer, and for the some, the play would be nothing without her”
7. “Pubic Hair”= Love Feathers/Plumage
8. “Lights on/Lights off”= Showtime/Mystery in Gotham
Here’s the original article: http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/single-ish/2010/07/no-more-blushing-in-bed-8-new.html
#6 and #8 are by far my absolute favorite. like out of control favorite.I hate that I like #6 that much because like I’m predictable, except that it is actually amazing(and also Lady M is my SHIT).
wait. i know you didn’t mean to. but you just gave me a pen name.